6 ideas that can make you look cute, no matter what your age…

   ‘Babies are cute’. This is more like a universally known fact than a sweet observation. Be it any country on any part of the globe, little babies have the power to bring out a confirmed expression “How cute!” They deserve the birthright to be cute, lovely and naughty all at once because their innocence is still alive and kicking. And till the seriousness of teen or adulthood fails to reach them, they continue being adorable with their cute actions and lovely expressions. While I adore their cuteness and love to smile at a sweet face, I must admit it makes me a bit insecure. After all, bidding good-bye to those wonderful years is not easy and accepting the fact that you are not cute anymore is not easy too.

 When the harsh realities of life step in and we continue with our rather usual journey, it is impossible to expect praises of cuteness. As 'so-called' guidelines of life stress over how you do, what career you choose, how much you make and how many assets you gather, there is no room for your innocent looks or cute appeal. Except for few times that may be considered as attempts of flirting, we can no longer expect someone to comment on how cute we look or behave. Considered as rather odd, we are alarmed if someone does see us as one. I agree there is nothing wrong in growing up and vacating that department for our little buddies. But, can do we do some things that may make us look cute? What is the harm in engaging in some actions that can turn us into cute people, no matter what our age?

  When I say this, I do not mean praises of cuteness from our better-halves or partners. While they are supposed to appreciate us under the act of law, thanks to marriage or cupid attack, I want to talk about cuteness on a rather larger scale. It is just a fun thought to ponder if there are some things that can actually make us as sweet as the little baby next door. While I totally agree, there cannot be any sort of competition with these angelic sweethearts, it is just a fun-filled idea. After all, why should babies have all the cuteness? The answer being because they are so since birth, but let us see if we can borrow a little recognition our way. As humans we believe in finding solutions and solving challenges, so treat it as yet another puzzle if we can do something about this too.

  Do not consider any of these as fool-proof actions to be cute. Hence the title calls them ideas for a reason. If you follow it to the letter, yet fail to gather any appreciative expressions, do not blame me under any circumstances. I am just as inexperienced as you are so all the best. But you are more than welcome to try it out and share your experiences. 

  

Let us see if we can succeed in this rather hopeful attempt to be cute.

1.       Wear a smile – everytime, everywhere

I can vouch for this idea and give it a thumbs-up for working out always. No matter how young, old, smart, not-smart, silly, awkward or dumb you feel (like I do!), smiling works out in every situation. There is something sweet about smiles that make you appear cute most of the times. And it works as the best ice-breaker even amidst strangers, so smile often and move an inch closer to sweetness. And if you are to believe the scientific research about smiles and moods, they say it does radiate some glow through happy molecules. Well, science or no science, wearing a smile can make us cute, so why stop doing it? Give your stern face a break and leave aside your worries, while you smile. Problems will find your address one way or the other than why not greet it with a smile too? May be it melts away with your cuteness, you never know!

2.       Do some things out of your comfort zone

Before you discard this for making you look stupid or silly instead of cute, hear out the benefits of doing so within limits. Unless you end up dressing silly or acting weird in public, there are some chances that it may make you cute. Picture your grandparents typing on a laptop or your dad sporting a cool graphic t-shirt. Imagine your mom sending some cool emojis in your cooler lingo or your otherwise stern relatives dancing to some tunes. In each of these situations, stepping out of comfort zone to do something silly can actually make one cute. Staying within the so-called limits of our acceptable personality make us predictable boring individuals. Think of things that you don’t do usually and try it out once in a while. Wear something different, play like a kid, loosen up your adult face and just laugh/dance/jump/rejoice away from your usual.

3.       Be considerate and kind - take care of others like you do for yourself

I am sure each one of you are kind, considerate and helpful, not with an aim to be cute but as expected responsibilities of a good human being. But if such a good behavior makes you look cute, why not do it consciously every single time and increase the cuteness quotient? Holding door for others, greeting people, cooking meals for loved ones, making them laugh, listening to them no matter how tired, appreciating people for their efforts, participating in their plans and showing enthusiasm are just some of the ways to get there.

4.       Complain less, enjoy more

We don’t realize this but complaining turns into an unavoidable habit. Something, somewhere will always be wrong/incorrect/unjust and unfair. None of us have perfect lives packed in perfect gift boxes with a perfectly tied bow on top. When everyone is dealing through something undesirable, yet unavoidable, why complain and make ourselves look sad? One of the best ways to be cute is to look at life with a happier outlook. It is okay to fail, there is nothing embarrassing or shameful in making attempts for the ‘n’th time and nothing wrong in working at your own pace.  But learn to enjoy more and be light towards life, if it does not make you successful, it will at least make you cute.

5.       Laugh at yourself

Nothing is cuter than accepting yourself the way you are and laughing at everything that life gives you. When we laugh at our silliness, goof-ups and blunders, it shows our soft side. Be sensitive to the fact that we can be wrong too. Accept everything with open arms and stop pretending things are always under control. Admit your errors cutely, accept failures and bounce back again to reality.

6.       Admire simple things

Stop to observe the pattern of clouds, admire sunset, express love to your daily work, sing your favorite song as you do your usual chores and admire simple things. It does make you look cute when you submit yourself to the beauty of simplicity.

Suggest some more ideas from your end or try these out and provide a feedback. And at the end, if you still turn out to look sillier than cuter – take a deep breath, say ‘I feel cute from within’ three times and abort all further attempts from this idea list. I cannot afford negative publicity before I gain enough positive ones!

11 reasons why comedy genre rules my heart, screen and home….

…because it is funny. This one reason should be sufficient enough to describe my affection for comedy. But it is does not do justice to the enormous love in my heart. For a genre that makes life happy and moments pleasurable, comedy does a lot more than just break us into a few bouts of laughter. It is regarded as one of the most difficult forms of performing arts because it is challenging to make others laugh. Throw in some emotional dialogues or show a sad stressful picture and people can cry, but state one off-beat joke and no one laughs. Comedy genre is all about timing, meaning, situations and purpose. It is deeply rooted in the desire to spread happiness and joy within the otherwise usual moments of our routine life.

  I can regard myself as a strong advocate of the comedy genre. A die-hard fan who hunts for all things funny, I am attracted towards the magic of humor. When comedy gives us a chance to laugh, why miss the opportunity? I do not mean to disrespect other genres or label them as unnecessary. Every form of arts on screen is exceptionally brilliant and necessary for the audience. There are huge doses of efforts that go behind creating a single episode, let alone an entire series. Be it thriller or romance, satire or social drama, everything and anything is essential to create diversity on screen. But, if I ever get the impossibly possible opportunity to confer an award to the best genre, I will pick comedy with closed eyes. There is something about the possibility of just being happy that draws me towards comedy.

  While I was busy expressing my passionate love towards comedy all in the mind, an interesting thought stuck me. Why not honor its presence in my life with a dedicated blog post? These reasons arise straight from my heart as I thank comedy for everything it has done and will continue doing in the future. Thus without any doubt it rules my heart. I say screen in the title because apart from TV, the little screen on my phone is the appropriate platform too. Be it movies or television, my mind runs to the humorous pick whenever and wherever possible. My love for comedy started right since childhood. While picking a good program for the limited TV time in the evening, when my parents preferred comedy over other serious drama, I was glued to the laughter that followed. It forces one to forget the usual tensions of life for some mindless moments, no matter how short. If we cannot avoid the drama in our real plot, why pick the same on TV too? Why not dedicate some moments to humorous stories, when our own story is not so funny otherwise?

 Comedy is often regarded as a mindless genre. But if you think about the efforts behind it, it engages more mind than any other. Crafting jokes that click is the most difficult task. I detest comedy at the expense of offending others. Pure humor arises from the boldness to laugh at one’s own mistakes and blunders.

  Another major misconception about comedy points towards its silliness. It is regarded as a genre for the weak-hearted. People who refuse to accept the realities of life dive into the mindlessness of humor. It does not teach anything or is rather useless for the lack of a better word. But, I am yet to learn anything from the dark sides of thriller or so-called drama of a usual plot. If there are limited screen slots in my schedule, I rather laugh over some jokes than ponder about mind games of someone else.

  Comedy shows such as Frasier, The Office, Parks and recreation, Friends, and Hindi ones such as Taarak Mehta ka Ooltah Chasmah, Hum Paanch, Shriman Shrimati, and many others have pulled me into their charm, making me pen a long post in their honor.

  Having said this, I do not intend to demean any genre. Read it with a pinch of salt as I enlist my top 11 reasons with a smile. Laugh over the lighter notes and see if you can correlate. And never mind if you cannot, I welcome a diametrically opposite argument, after all we are products of our opinions!

I love comedy shows because….

1.       They show blunders of life are funny, common, usual and easy to deal with if we change the perspective. Humor arises when we accept our shortcomings and learn to loosen a bit.

2.       They force everyone to quit serious procrastination, heavy contemplation and unwanted complications. Stay happy for the moment that will compile into episodes of happiness.

3.       They make you realize laughter is the medicine to heal wounded mood. When life is full of otherwise hurdles, why not swim into the pool of laughter?

4.       The genre screams about the significance of simplicity. We make life overly complicated. And agreed, it cannot erase our troubles, but at least not add to the burden.

5.       They wipe off alien feelings in a new land and connect everyone on the same platform. Comedy succeeds in erasing home-sickness or boredom in an unknown place.

6.       They connect everyone on the universal mission of laughter. Though we may differ in our choices of favorite genres, we can be connected by comedy because everyone loves (and hopefully knows) to laugh.

7.       Comedy opens the mind to positivity. It is composed of jokes and humor that make it easier to approach things with a broader outlook.

8.       They pose as a foolproof mode of confirmed entertainment. Though some comedy shows fail horribly with poor-timed jokes and offensive content that irritate more than make you laugh, most of them do a perfect job.

9.       They remind you to stop worrying and start acting. Since problems cannot be dealt through over-thinking, they force you to be present in the moment and enjoy the show. If you miss a dialogue in some usual drama, you can still get the show, but if you miss a joke, you lose the punch!

10.   Comedy is the only thing that can make you laugh, it is capable of demanding laughter and smiles. No matter how serious your face appears most of the times, comedy can transform it within a minute.

11.   The genre tickles an otherwise serious mind. Our mind can be stern often, reminding us of everything that is wrong and unfair. Comedy has the power to take it towards simpler realities.

  As I read the post, I realize it has turned into a love letter for comedy. But that is exactly how I feel. I love you for bringing big smiles, I love you for all the episodes of laughter, I love you for making me sane in an otherwise insane world, and comforting me that life is beautiful indeed.

  A loyal fan to all shows comic, this funny soul will continue finding more and more reasons to laugh, love and smile.

What genre rules your heart? Does comedy ring a bell or is it something else- do think and share!

7 actions to go ‘carpe diem’

   I consider myself one of the strongest advocates of the thought ‘personal experiences teach the most’. No matter how much one insists/ forces/urges or commands, it is less likely to create a long-lasting impact than your own encounters and experiences. Though our elders guide us towards more favorable things in life, we tend to ignore the advice unless tried by ourselves. Call it human nature or the desire to experiment and learn, we prefer making an attempt before confirming a well-known theory. 

  Our inquisitiveness and willingness to try it at least once drives us towards less desirable actions too. It is one of the foolproof ways to learn, adopt and follow for the rest of our life. But, why this sudden affection towards our experimental nature? The answer lies in my own little exercise since last couple of years. A project that forced me to stop over-thinking and embrace the present. A self-created assignment that forced me to live in the moment, one day at a time, rather than planning unnecessarily into the future.

   So, what is carpe diem? A Latin phrase that talks about seizing the day over impractical thoughts of the future, it is more about living in the moment. It is about embracing the present fully before worrying/ celebrating/ thinking about something way ahead of the journey. 

  With this thought, I do not mean to demean the incredible task of planning. We all need to plan in advance to make better choices and decisions for the bright future. Living one day at a time may not be feasible always when there are constructive projects demanding broader vision. But, when this so-called planning takes out a larger part of our system, it is a warning for caution. Under the pretext of making a good future, when all one thinks about is tomorrow, what about today? We assume happier and peaceful moments once we are settled, but is there any such thing as ‘settled’? A mirage that only adds hope but never materializes, isn’t it incorrect to postpone everything for that happier tomorrow.

   Living in the moment may not work for every individual. How we look at the thought depends a lot on our choices, priorities and goals. Not everyone can enjoy the present for the fear of destroying their future. It also depends on what you weigh more- universal success or personal happiness? Living in the moment is more for the adventure-loving happier folks, while planning every single thing to the ‘T’ is for those bound by deadlines. Those who fear missing out on the so-called acceptable stages of life may find it uncomfortable to quit thinking and start living. For the over-thinkers who cannot stop worrying about the future, this may seem more of a destructive exercise than a constructive project.

   There is nothing wrong in what you choose because at the end, you are the best judge of your situation. Besides, circumstances influence your outlook, so there is no such thing as correct or incorrect.  As a transformed member from the over-thinker to the present-day lover, I can vouch for the fact that life is beautiful when taken one step at a time. It does not mean quitting some successful plans for the future, but adjusting the ratio. If you thought about the future for 60-80% of your waking moments, make it 10%. Quit the habit of dreaming, when you are actually living the dream at this moment. Consider 365 days of fun-filled moments rather than few reserved ones during vacations and special occasions. Routine is boring, but the ability to hunt some embedded fun is the key. Do not expect larger than life celebration every single day, but make the overall experience much happier than you assumed it to be.

    The only way to do it is by living in the present. Make it a conscious habit and see it turn into a usual action. Though I am stressing over its significance and know the benefits, I am only human to make mistakes and fail quite often. Let me share seven actions of living in the moment borrowed from my instruction manual. You may agree to some of them or reject them completely. You may find it impossible and incorrect to go ‘carpe diem’ or you may be practicing some of them yourself. Do share your feedback because together we learn and together we realize.

1.       Observe

Observe the things around you with open eyes. Though it sounds like the most obvious thing we do, how often do we stop to admire the mountains, look at the sky color, see the trees and follow the birds? Over-practical individuals will argue about lack of time. In that case, observe whatever you do with a conscious effort. Do not take everything for granted and activate your visual senses. Observe minute details of things around you, it is one of the actions to be aware of your present surrounding rather than painting some dreamy pictures of tomorrow.

2.       Hear

Activate your hearing senses to the present. Appreciate natural sounds, music, tunes, talks and voices to be in the moment. When we make efforts to see and hear, we are automatically switched to the present. How often do you watch something on the television but your mind is someplace else- imaging, planning, wondering, or worrying? Or how often do you phase out when someone talks about their experience only to correlate it with your own life? Be committed to the sound of the moment than the background noise of the future.

3.       Feel and express

Pay attention to how you feel at the moment. Happy, sad, angry, guilty, surprised, embarrassed or just excited? Respond to the feeling, accept the actions and express your reactions. When you are open to the present feeling, you will have no time to procrastinate, imagine, or dream. Enjoy the offering of today by being there rather than hoping for some better alternative in the future. Express and communicate your feelings with people around instead of bottling it up for one fine day.  

4.       Accept ‘this is it’

Most of our problems arise from the lack of acceptance. I may be taking the liberty of assuming that you all do the same, but more often than desired we end up being unsatisfied with the present. There is no harm in believing that the future is brighter for it makes us better version of ourselves. It is human nature when we work hard for a good future, but it has to start from right here, right now. Our pretension of working for the future takes away the fun from today, only to invite regret several years down the line.

5.       Appreciate

If we tune our minds to live in the moment, we will find numerous chances to appreciate. Appreciate people, nature, things, experiences and everything in your present. Say thank-you more often. Observe one unique good thing in your surrounding every day. Halt, enjoy, appreciate and move ahead. Why does a mountain miles away from home feel so special but the one in our neighborhood is just usual? If sun is the same everywhere, why is it easy to admire it at special sunset spots around the globe? I do not intend to say traveling is unnecessary. In fact, travel often to enjoy the present, but make sure to appreciate the routine things in your neighborhood too.

6.       Surprise your routine

Routine is boring but routine is necessary. We can rarely change it except during vacations. We cannot change typical hours of a workday. We can neither change the commute nor the work profile. But we can surprise ourselves with little changes when ‘off the clock’. Use your quality ‘me’ time even if it is as short as five minutes to do something different every day. Read a book one day, paint something on the other, listen to music, do different things to increase enthusiasm. Routine makes us better humans but it can also make us boring, sad and predictable. Surprise yourself once in a while, it is worth it.

7.       Keep practicing, each day is a new one

Do not assume my flow of words stand for successful implementation of the idea. It is always, always and once again always, ‘Easier said than done’. These seven actions are not foolproof because I slip on numerous occasions. It is quite tempting to dream about some years in the future, rather than being receptive to the ‘here and now’. But, I will never quit. It is okay to be carried away once in the while so continue making attempts every single day. Any moment you see yourself in worries about tomorrow- warn your mind, make it aware, shout/love/punish/pamper in your style but come back again.

Just start doing it. Value your present more than the past or future. Past is totally useless and an absolute waste of time. Visiting old memories quite often can unknowingly keep you away from making memories now.

  Carpe diem, seize the day, live in the moment, embrace the present- for ‘this’ is all you have before ‘that’ is yours.

Clicked at the Sierra Rizing bakery and cafe, California

5 steps to deal with life’s lemons

   Before I could make sense of metaphors and deep philosophical thoughts, I remember checking my refrigerator for life’s famous lemons. Because if the thought ‘When life gives you lemons’ was true indeed, it would be sitting somewhere in the kitchen. But each time I failed to hunt those free gifts, it was essential to accept it stood for something else. 

   These famous lemons which life seems to distribute generously to everyone, everywhere stand for the vast load of problems. And each one of us can vouch for the fact that life does distribute them freely. Before you can even understand or think, life hand delivers them to your doorstep. And no form of feedback, negotiation or even begging works in this case because life has a strict agenda of just handing them out to every single individual on the planet. Must say, life is pretty generous when it comes to these bitter-sour freebies. For a product you never ordered and for an unnecessary item that lands on your doorstep, you have no other option but to deal with it.

 For those of you who do not know about these lemons, they stand for all the challenges and troubles thrown at us. As lemons are combination of sour, bitter and tangy flavors that make us wink, they are forced to represent this unfavorable metaphor. They symbolize sour tastes that are interesting in slight quantities but totally undesirable when added in excess.

 There are many fancy phrases that suggest ways to deal with them. Either make lemonade or order some tequila and salt. Either be responsible or go wild. Either use them for your benefit or sit and complain for days on end. Whatever way you choose, there is no escape path spelled out in bold letters. Life is determined to deliver problems and challenges along your path, no matter how much you avoid it or how well you hide yourself. It will deliver its free lemons and head to the next house, before you even check the package. 

  So, if there is no way to avoid these freebies, why don’t we accept them with open hands and think of a way out? Rather than hunting for a customer care number to register our complaints, why don’t we find ways to handle them all by ourselves?

  Thanks to this deep thinking, I am curious to devise some steps. Though I would love to stop the inflow of free lemons, I can do nothing about it. Yet, I can definitely ponder about few actions to deal with them. Stay with me as I walk from one step to the other in an attempt to do something about these sour factors available in excess.

 Adding an interesting exercise to the series, this particular listicle is a flowchart to enjoy the undesirable freebies. Why complain when life wants to give us something free of cost? Though we may not like it or want it, we don’t really have any choice, do we?

  This is my idea from step 1 to step 5. Do share your way of handling life’s lemons. Do you throw them yards away from your house or do you welcome them in for your advantage?

Step 1: Bring them to the table- Acceptance is the first step, after all

Agreed, none of us like problems. But is there any way to stop it? Rather than complaining, we can accept it and bring those free lemons to the table. Denial is the most dangerous habit that leads to nothing but disappointment. Accept the fact that you are no different. Accept the fact that we cannot be immune to challenges and finally accept it problems make us a better version of ourselves. They may seem undesirable, but they are the only key to development. If life chooses you as the lucky recipient of lemons (or in this case, the unlucky one), there is nothing wrong about it. Do not curse your stars, planets, moon and everything in the universe because none of them can take it back. Instead accept it and hunt a solution as soon as possible. Cut the melodrama of "Why me?" and get to the phrase "Ok fine, it's me."

Step 2: Hunt for a good recipe- find the solution

  Bring out your cookbooks or in today’s times - browse through your favorite food blogs. Decide what do want to do with those free lemons. Lemonade, lemon cheese cake, lemon pickle, lemon pie, tangy cocktail or mocktail – the options are endless. To translate to into our metaphor, find solutions to your problems. Seek advice, opinions and ideas. Find the way to handle these troubles without unnecessary stress. Think with a cool head and seek solutions to prevent disappointment. Nothing is easy, but neither is it impossible. Every solution will demand efforts, hard work, dedication and pain. What recipe you decide and what you wish to do with it is your way of life. No one can stop you from your path, at the same time no one can take away your problems. Your recipe needs your inputs, just as your challenge needs your contribution.

Step 3- Put on the apron- act on the problem

  You brought the lemons in, you found the recipe, now is the time to work on it. Get to the task and act immediately. Eliminate the challenges as much as you can with whatever resources you have. It is definitely easier said than done. Working on our problem may not be as simple as working on a recipe, but this is our overthinking mind with its usual procrastination. Make the lemonade, bake that difficult pie, try your hands on a delicious lemon pickle. In short - invest efforts, make mistakes, get hurt, fall down, stand, and do it again- a bit improved, the next time. We are not perfect or capable enough to handle our problems in a flawless way. But, we are definitely capable to make efforts for ‘n’ number of times as needed.

Step 4- Savor the preparation – celebrate your efforts

Take some time to unwind. Relax after the big challenge. Savor the dish for all your inputs. You deserve a pat on the back for standing strong and reaching so far. It is said we must not take pride in our own achievements for the possibility of being too much in our heads. But, we must pause for a while and congratulate our strong mind. It deserves a little love, affection and recognition. You may have solved the challenge or failed to do so, but in either case, the ability to handle things is much important.

Step 5- Save the recipe- store the lessons

If you enjoyed the lemon pie- do remember to save the recipe. It will help the next time, when life gives you yet another batch of lemons. Remember the way you dealt with your troubles. Preserve your strength, confidence and ability to handle it well. When a similar situation arises in the future, you must be able to erase it quickly. And if a different circumstance raises its ugly head, you can still borrow your inner trust and faith.

  There is no foolproof way to handle problems. There is no way to predict their arrival. It is impossible to make sense of this uncertainty, but we can only prepare ourselves to deal much better. When life is giving lemons, why not enjoy the opportunity and turn it to our advantage. Why not learn, progress, turn stronger and happier than we are today?

 How do you handle the free package? 

Do you hunt for a recipe or a toll-free complaint number? 

Do you turn it into pies or dump it into trash? 

Do you exhibit excitement for trying a new recipe or throw them away in anger? 

Whatever you do, do share your ideas with others. A little learning, a little sharing, and a little pondering will help “When life gives us lemons!”

16 things I would rather do than go shopping

Disclaimer: For the millions and billions who love shopping, this post may seem disturbing. Read at your own risk. The writer does not wish to offend shopaholics and shop-lovers. Her hatred for what they love is purely based on personal opinion.

  To begin with, the birth-story of this unusual post is quite interesting. As a matter of fact the background idea that led to this article deserves more screen space than the real listicle itself. Because what I will like to do than shop will just be a long list of random actions, but why did I come to this topic at the first place is more exciting. Why the urge to oppose shopping and why the urge to find some funny alternatives? For those who know me well, shopping is the least of my favorite activities. While this may sound too unusual -considering the joy offered by shopping, I am totally unsure why this weird expression in my genome?

   For me shopping was and will always be nothing less than a mandatory activity to ‘buy things’. I must pat my back for openly confessing the novel aspect of my personality. It is not easy to be truthful about such unusual thoughts because we are wired to love shopping. It is a stress buster activity for millions of people around the globe who find pleasure in the variety and quality. And there is nothing wrong if you belong to this expanding group because those are the expected and ‘so-called’ qualities of a ‘normal’ human. And though I have dared to be open about this, I only hope to be loved and accepted like the same way before. Please do not disown me, while I hate your favorite activity.

This attitude places me in a tiny club of minorities who detest shopping. I am not even sure if such a group exists because I am yet to find someone remotely close to my thoughts. And because I do not want to enter into gender-based stereotypical domain, I cannot comment on those who hate or love shopping.

  I am not sure whether I must blame the new-age concept of ‘minimalist living’ or express hatred towards ‘materialistic approach’ for this rather unique behavior. But I am convinced that my hostility towards shopping runs way before any such fancy things entered into the market. That does not mean I do not need to shop, but I am unable to find excitement, happiness or eagerness to do it. Be it shopping for clothes, bags, shoes, home goods or basic food, it turns into a rather heavy responsibility.

  The thought of hunting for items, trying them on and filling bags overwhelms the little dreamer in me who cannot find joy in any of those racks. And though this cost saving aspect of wife should please ‘the man’, he finds it rather scary. Talk about stereotypical nature and expected behavior because it is only natural to be alarmed. You know you hate shopping when you look at it as a punishment. Rather than roaming around in open air, the thought of spending hours in enclosed environment is nothing but punishment after all.

During one such detested experience, while dear husband was busy modelling shoes in his favorite shop for the ‘nth’ time in row, an interesting idea poked into my mind. And before I realized, I was scribbling notes on my phone. Though these scribblings were just broken thoughts at random, they were answers to the question “What I would rather do than shop?” To my surprise, the list grew longer and longer, while my fingers typed them out effortlessly. Those random ideas were just funny actions to engage my mind. But I truly enjoyed the imaginative pleasure that followed.

 Before I enlist them, it is essential to clear my stand. I do not have anything against those who love shopping or find pleasure in all its styles, including window and online. It is an important economic model that is essential at every levels. Also, I have nothing against the brands, shops, retailers, wholesalers and goods. Everything I have is against the better half who drags me into shops! But, I should be thankful to him for planting this interesting blog idea. Though I don’t enjoy shopping, I can continue increasing the length of this list. Every time I drag my feet through a mall or shop, I feel like an ‘Alice in wonderland’. I fail to understand why but walking in shops resembles a guilty feeling of breaking into someone’s backyard. A place I am not supposed to be, yet loiter around for no good reason.

  Coming back on track, while I continue to battle with these ill feelings for the act of shopping, let me share my scribbled list. It is just a funny one intended to amuse my irritated mind.

1.       Count the number of waves on a beach in an hour

2.       Note the changing shades of sky and sea waters from dawn to dusk, while sitting on the beach shore

3.       Hike mountains while counting the number of steps taken

4.       Capture selfie with trees, mountains, sea, sunset, sunrise

5.       Prepare a folder with photographs of diverse cloud patterns and find the appropriate scientific name for each

6.       Spend hours browsing a single shelf of books in library

7.       Sample one book from every non-fictional book shelf

8.       Track the route of flights I see in the sky through a live app

9.       Track the route of a bird till I lose her

10.   Walk around in the neighborhood and count number of trees

11.   Walk bare-feet inside a park lawn

12.   Stare into the sky, appearing to be deep in thoughts, while only thinking about what to eat

13.   Watch mindless comedy shows on phone while sitting on a park bench

14.   Read an entire boring car manual start to end on a beach

15.   Watch TV in the community gym room, while pretending to work out on the treadmill

16.   Read a horror book by the poolside

All of this just proves, I can do anything but shop. Count trees, read manuals, walk or just stare, I can do any of it than wander in malls with ‘n’ number of things that haunt me.

 What is your take on this unusual idea? Do you agree with me (which I highly doubt) or do you believe you can brainstorm my weird thoughts? Whatever be your stand, let the arguments begin…..

10 things I learned from my 20s

   To be honest, writing this post will be a bitter-sweet experience. Bitter for the fact of entering into the big 30 and sweet for the lovely sound of “happy birthday to me”. Though adulthood is nowhere close to fun-filled childhood with immense excitement for birthdays, it still offers the pleasure of a large and well deserved cake (like the one I just had!) 

 Standing at the exit door of 20s to enter into 30s is a bit overwhelming. Soon as 20s transform into something in the past, and 30s is the new present, the gravity of situation will poke for at least a year or two from now. But if that is the rule of life, why be sad with the increasing digits? Why not use it as an opportunity to write something and thank my 20s for all it gave me? (Yes, this is one of the many ways to pump excitement and reduce my sadness of that large 30).

  While I cannot carry the exciting title of 20s any further, I can always think about the lessons learned. Experiences turn into memories which eventually turn into lessons. Though 20s will be about the past, the realities learned will remain fresh into the future. 20s is one of the best phases of life for it forces one to transit from happy teen years to responsible adulthood. It offers excellent benefit of doubt. You are not extremely matured to know life in and out, but at the same time you are not kids anymore to stay away from the new-found independence. Somewhere between childhood and adulthood, it is good experimental phase to get your life together. It is like departing from a safety net; once you are out of the handsome 20s, the serious 30s wait to grip you (this is the example of how my mind is teasing me)

 But on a serious note, let me share the amazing lessons I learned in the eventful 20s. They may resonate with your experiences or may seem totally absurd to be true. Either ways, it will open your thought book to revise your lessons once again.

1.       Life is product of my own decisions and choices

We enjoy the fun game of blaming others including situations, people, circumstances and everything around us. Even I am guilty of doing so, several times in the past. But my 20s stressed over the fact that our life is reflection of what we think, do, desire and work towards. It is a product of our decisions. My choices and dreams is paving the road for me, hence there is nothing else to complain about.

2.       Life is not as difficult as marketed

If you ask me who marketed so, I do not have an answer. Because maybe it is something I interpreted from the thought process of adults. It is always believed adulthood is difficult, taxing, tiresome, worrying and serious. But I realized 20s was not so difficult after all. Sure, I am not qualified to comment on the hardships ahead, but I am convinced it is not difficult unless we want it to be. There is always a way out for everything and life is always wonderful because it depends on the glasses we put on.

3.       A little craziness does not hurt

What is with the preconceived notion of behaving seriously as adults? Agreed, it important to pose good examples for our kids of next generation, but a little craziness does not hurt. 20s made me realize I can bring out the child in me whenever needed. Age does not decide the shade of my nail paint or the amount I laugh. Also, it is okay to do things decided by my heart including funny adventures and childish activities.

4.       At the end, what matters is inner happiness

Do not tag me selfish as soon as you read this. But, it is true to the last letter. Inner happiness radiates joy externally that makes other happy too. We tend to neglect our happiness under the pretext of working for others or assuming it will affect our responsibilities. But what we fail to realize is taking care of others turns into a happy task when we love ourselves. Our happiness is the source of happiness for others hence it is undoubtedly the most important. Quality ‘me’ time is a must and so is loving ourselves. And if you still believe it to be selfish, in that case selfishness is fair too.

5.       Experience, explore and experiment

Growing up we relate adulthood to money, assets, power and position. It is good to harbor dreams and work hard in that direction. I will be unbelievably philosophic if I say money does not matter, because it truly does. It is the sole means and hence a necessity. But not at the cost of sacrificing the promising present and postponing it for future retirement. Different experiences should be gathered at different stages of our life. Hence 20s made it clear - gather experiences, experiment with novel things and explore everything with open arms. It pushed me out of a comfort zone to be receptive towards new things.

6.       If thoughts could move mountains, earth’s landscape would keep changing every day

“Overthinking is such as absolute waste of your present”- I have quoted my mind in a good way, trust me when I say this because it is not so kind whenever it speaks to me. Since my thoughts are not powerful enough to move mountains, my 20s warned me about the dangers of just plain thinking. What people think about me? What should I think about them? Why is this so? Why is this not so? Why it happens to us? What if people misunderstand me? Nothing of this matters. People will think what they want to. No amount of clarification will help or it is not even required. Hence I thank my 20s for putting a limit to my unnecessary thinking.

7.       The earth revolves around the sun, not around you

 Another sarcastic thought from my 20s. It makes me sad to hear, but there is no better way of saying it. We tend to give too much importance to ourselves or take our life too seriously. There is no rule book or stop watch for every development in our life. Time and circumstances are different for everyone, so listen to your own calling. It is ok to fail, cry, fall down, do something different, be unconventional, and be defeated, mocked and teased in life. We can always learn and make another attempt. There is scope for improvement but no scope for giving up. Do not give undue importance to failure or tears. Be sad for a while, accept it and get back sooner than later.

8.       Suppressed feelings will choke the system

       I always thought childhood is for expression, while adulthood is for suppression. I assumed it was incorrect to express feelings as an adult and one is supposed to hide it well to appear sane, sound, and matured. But, as the first bite to adulthood, 20s proved me wrong. No matter how well we try to present ourselves, it is only human to lose it once in a while. It is ok to cry, talk, express and convey our feelings in a healthy way, rather than suppressing it for some serious damage.

9.       Your ego is more dangerous than pollution, global warming, terrorism, and every threat combined together

This lesson may take lot of years to be implemented into my system, but 20s gave the first glimpse. Ego is dangerous and will only destroy a person before he/she realizes. Forget about position, age, expected behavior and past history- forget and forgive. Life’s credit limit is too small to keep a tab on every person/situation or incident.

10.   And at the end, age is just a number

This final lesson sums it all. Though I wouldn’t agree to it as a young teen or even in my early 20s, I realize it now why adults convinced this to themselves and others on every birthday. Now that I am in the same boat, I will do it too. Age is truly a number and it depends on how we look at it. We can either sit and complain that we are growing old or we can use every year as a new opportunity because it will occur only once in life. And I strongly choose to do the latter. So all the kids, teens and young 20s club members out there, you will have to bear with me, while I scream “Age is just a number”!

   I loved my 20s like every other person does and will truly miss it for being one of the best decades of my life. It taught, punished, hated, cared, shouted, kicked, embarrassed, embraced me but never stopped loving me.

   To the new beginning of 30s- hope you are as kind as the years gone by……

The 'listicle' series

  

    They say listicle is the new black. Or to put it the other way, listicles are in fashion now. A new trending concept where lists are framed over long articles, the primary aim is to express thoughts through usage of lists. List down variety of things depending on the topic and an interesting concept takes birth. Listicles are fun owing to the surprise of what follows next. It is easy to speak our mind through long chain of thoughts, but when it is time to list it down, the novelty begins. What and how to line them is unique in its own way. And for a talkative blogger like me, it instills an invisible pressure to pick few headings and channel my thoughts.

 After an exciting series of writing open letters, here I am with the next series in line. While the entire blogging world is buzzing with fun lists and every online magazine is busy listing some fun stuff out of the usual, I was tempted to follow suit. And though I agree, I am exceptionally bad at following fashion, I just hope this experiment works well for once.

  While that is something for you readers to decide, I promise to have loads of fun while at it. Pick some topic each time and list down contents with little explanation will be the new mantra going forward. Yes, explanation is a part of it because writing is all I have and no, please do not skip through it.  

  As always, these thoughts are pure fragments of my funny imagination. Do remember to sit with your usual pinch of salt because pun, sarcasm, humor and jokes (directed towards me, of course!) are highly intentional. And I intend to put my readers to work. Reading is not your only job, you are expected to frame down your version of the list too. Share it the way you want, but your inputs will be exciting additions to the discussion (Will a fat prize for the best feedback work as the intended bribe!?) But on a serious note, I love your feedback because that runs my blog (again not literally, financially or figuratively, but emotionally, if there is such a thing). Also, if there are some fun topics in your mind, shout it out. Will make an attempt to frame them as long as it does not embarrass me in public!

 Starting with the first listicle, the topic relates to everyone irrespective of age, gender, profession or lifestyle. Because sleeping is followed by waking up and waking up follows sleep, each one of us connect to it.

 LISTICLE 1: Five things that get me out of bed, each morning.

  Technically, it is just one thing. The stupid blaring alarm who does not seem to possess any form of self-respect. Though I hate it every single day and greet it with anger, frustration, and sorrow, it seems to enjoy its job. Alarm clocks are annoying messengers of the sun who are not bothered by the treatment directed towards them. You postpone it, hit it hard, throw it away or simply hide under the pillow, yet it continues its dutiful work each morning (just for dramatic effect - kindly ignore the fact that we actually set it up!)

 So, let’s not enter into this sensitive topic because it needs a separate post for itself. Concentrating on the topic in hand, these five things represent the happiness of a new day. They stand for joy that take me from the start to end of a new day, new hope, new excitement and yet another new story. I believe each day is a new story in itself and job of these five things is to keep me on track. By things, I do not mean literal five physical materials. They can be objects, experiences, or some fun ideas. The thought of these factors gets me out of bed, as they promise staying awake will be as beautiful as the deep sleep I just enjoyed.

   Each one of us needs some form of motivation to power our day. Finding our own source of inspiration is the real trick because it is free from any hidden expectations, compulsions or motives. It rises from the purity of inner happiness and internal joy, making it more amazing than the one derived from someone else.

In the ascending order of ‘when’ I greet them from morning to evening, here are my five things:

1.       Coffee – A controversial topic not open to any form of discussion, coffee is the first thing that pushes me to start my day. With my little espresso machine greeting me with its promising sound and smell of fresh coffee that strikes right into my brain, this sole cup does the trick. I dread days without this machine or worst without any coffee left on the planet!

2.       Sight of the sky – Call me a day-dreamer, wanderer or lost soul on earth, I enjoy the sight of blue sky out of the window. Except for rainy days that make me grumpy just like the dull sky above, I look forward to admiring the sight of changing blue shades all day long.

3.       Book – Reading transports me someplace else. As rightly said, reading can take you places, the thought of reading yet another good book can keep me sane, while I struggle with the usual routine.

4.       Sunset- Sunsets are associated with sad feelings of darkness or restlessness of moving towards the end of a day, but I actually enjoy this beautiful sight. Looking at the wonderful stars and colorful shades of sunset make it extremely peaceful for the restless mind.

5.       Dinner- This will be quite surprising for all those who know me well. Considering my strict formal ties with food, greeting it each day just for survival, dinners actually brighten my day or rather end it well. Planning what to make, irritating husband for options, hunting for recipes, and finally making something out of my own choice is fun in its own way. Except for boring dinners that mean ‘tried-and-tested’ recipes or non-exciting meals, the idea of experimenting with fun stuff is interesting.

  

 What is your take on things that keep you motivated? How do you ensure the difficult process of waking up transforms into an exciting experience, while you wait to greet your five favorite things?

Let the thinking begin...

Open letter - 10 (Myself)

    

   As the addressee of this letter is quite unusual, I am starting with a quick note to the readers- Yes, it is addressed to myself in the second person and no, it is not weird or crazy. My intention of writing to myself was to address everything I feel, think, analyze, judge about me as a person yet refuse to acknowledge it since it is not something we do often. As humans, we are programmed to hold opinions about others, but fail to confront ourselves or talk to our self in the second person (or maybe, it is something others do and I don’t, hence I was excited with the idea as soon as it sprouted). 

   In short, this open letter is designed to talk to the individual named ‘myself’, referring it with the word ‘you’. Cutting the confusion- in simple words, I am writing to myself. I am holding ‘myself’ as a different person – appreciating her for the good things, suggesting improvements, analyzing her weirdness and finally celebrating her presence in this exciting maze of life.

  Though it is addressed to myself, I believe some of the thoughts may resonate with your feelings too. Somewhere or sometimes we all tend to think the same about ourselves, while enjoying the opportunity of being human. Shout out a ‘yes’ if you agree or give a thumbs down if you don’t, but do take it with a pinch of salt. Sarcasm and humor are purely intentional, hence leave the judgement glasses aside!

  Now, to the loveliest person who means the world…… (Narcissism is intentional too, after all it is an excellent side effect of writing to myself!)

    

                                                                            

Dear Myself,

   This is probably the first time I am writing to you. Though there is so much I would like to tell you, I did not feel the need to pen it down. But that is when it turned into ‘taking you for granted’, hence I picked the opportunity to write a long letter to the self who means so much. While I will focus on talking to you in general, pardon me if it turns into a self-help lecture. You are the core of my life, hence loving you is the first step towards loving others. Unless I am comfortable, loving, caring and responsible towards you, those feelings cannot reflect on the universe. They say loving yourself can turn selfish, but that is the most commonly held misconception. In fact, it is the best way to share happiness to those around. Only when I started appreciating your presence, I realized life is so much better while sharing it with others too.

  You are nothing less than a surprise package to me. At times, you seem predictable with expected behavior and seem to walk on the road most taken that definitely leads to the destination. But most of the times, you enjoy going off track and trying something different. Your need to find a purpose, desire to make yourself happy and belief in yourself inspires me. It serves as the single most essential purpose of living that ensures unlimited happiness and joy to everyone around. You do not settle down to what others think is perfect. You know it well, perfect and ideal are nothing but fictional concepts. Hence the desire to do what your heart says drives you to happiness. You have shown its power. Success, settled life, expected milestones are necessary, but above all, your emphasis on a pure heart and happy mind tends to open my eyes.

   Why do you keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again? Agreed, you fall into the temptation of being yourself all the time, but it is not wise to repeat your errors. Stay away from things that don’t appeal to you. Refrain from getting angry when you realize it’s harmful and swallow that ego. You know it causes more harm than good, but something about not wanting to helpful yourself! At the end, practice what you preach, there is no better way to live life than by staying true to your words.

  I enjoy when you appreciate and accept everything. Good days are not the right days to measure your attitude. Successful and sunny days bring out the best in people, quite naturally. But what is necessary is the ability to smile when disappointed. Of course, I don’t expect a bigger smile on those days, but at least the capacity to accept the bad too.

 I like it when you make mistakes and learn from them. That is the best foolproof method to ensure guaranteed stability. I also admire your desire to experiment, fail, make an attempt once again and then achieve something at the end. Take it as a cautionary warning from your closest well-wisher- do not fall into the trap of pleasing people. You were never designed to act as a puppet. Everyone has a different opinion on how you should live your life, hence it is practically impossible to appeal to even 10%, let alone all of them. You know this well, yet fail to understand or simply choose to ignore.

  Do not forget where you come from. Your past experiences are lessons for the future. Take advice from everyone, listen to their experiences, seek guidance but make your own choice. You are the best judge to your situation hence you may not be entirely wrong. And what is with blaming everything around you. It is easy to transfer your faults- everything and everyone can be held responsible for your life. But is it right? Not at all. It is your story and journey, all the other members are simply passengers, willing to enjoy the trip with you. As a driver behind the steering wheel, take charge or rather hold it well before it is too late.

  And stop being in your head all the time. Do not take yourself so seriously to a point where you assume the world revolves around you. People do not have time to care about your looks, personality, clothes and assets. As long as you are presentable (which I sincerely hope you are, considering the well-known lack of your fashion sense!), it is okay to just be yourself. There are more pressing issues in the world than the unknown local brand of your bag or style of your clothes. Also, do not think so much- research has shown your excessive overthinking is absolutely baseless, pointless, and useless- need I say more?

 But above everything, you are awesome. Agreed, you are confused, scared, funny, irritating, naughty and fun-loving, yet amazing in your own way. Stay so forever because life is an opportunity, and not everyone gets a second chance...(you know it better) 

 And finally, if I haven't told you already or was too shy to actually say it - I LOVE YOU! Writing it down was not so difficult, after all. 

Yours lovingly,

A lifelong partner to your stupidity

P. S: This is my last letter in the open letter series. I enjoyed writing these open letters as a fun way to speak what’s in my mind. Hope you enjoyed walking inside the maze of my thoughts and did not get lost in it like I always tend to. Till I return again with the next off-beat idea- happy reading, happy living and the most important of all- happy ‘being yourself’!