Moments, when you are ‘alive’

   

I am sure this unusual title will raise many eyebrows!

 How can some moments make you feel ‘alive’, when you are already living a journey all through your lifetime?

 How is it possible to label only few moments as ‘alive’?

If some moments seem ‘alive’, don’t we live our life along every breath of the journey?

    Before these questions pull you into a philosophical course, let me take you through some interesting pieces of my imagination. A recent experience of long drive over a scenic road gave birth to this title. Though we live our journey as a tale with unique plots and set of interesting characters, there is more to life than just a routine story with a start and an end. Several moments enter into our lives with their beautiful feel that take us closer to the joy of living. Moments marked by love, enjoyment, feelings, adventures, happiness and surprises, such experiences add some distinct flavor to our recipes.

     One cannot explain these moments in words, but they do represent something different. Routine course of journey takes us through several ups and downs. Though these happenings influence our lives in one way or the other, they cannot impart joy in any way. It is during some interesting moments, when life seems colorful and joyous. Be it social moments where we meet people or be it quiet moments when we admire the beauty of nature, be it happening moments with power packed actions or relaxed moments with no agenda, life is about such colors always. These moments gain entry into our collection of memories, as we look at them with happiness. Over a period of time, when life takes us over a nostalgic lane, these memories spell out joy.

    Such memorable experiences can measure the course of our life. Money, assets, fame and fortune cannot evaluate our tale as these elements come across as temporary factors. As situations and circumstances govern our life journey, it is important to live it to the fullest. Moments of love, happiness, joy and peace measure the depth of our life. They sow enthusiasm in our system, as we hope to embrace the ultimate joy.

     Though we all perform our duties, take care of responsibilities, ascend through every phase and fulfill all essential tasks as needed, life is more than any of these things. It is more about loving your own self and experiencing pure joy. It is also about embracing enjoyment that grows from within. Though we are surrounded by numerous loved ones that add purpose and joy to our lives, it is essential to look for happiness from deep within. Once we experience such moments closely, we are able to live to the fullest.

    This chain of thoughts prompted me to list down moments that make us feel ‘alive’. Scroll down through my experiences, while you think about your own. Do send in your comments and suggestions to color this post with your content!

Moments, when ‘you’ are alive:

-         - when an innocent toddler smiles at you with magic in eyes and glow on the face

-          -when you look at calm stretch of blue waters in the sea

-          -when you admire light blue shade of the sky

-          -when you look at rising and falling waves of the beach

-         - when you admire the mighty stretch of tall mountains and long hill ranges

-          -when flock of birds fly together in the sky

-          -when you meet your loved ones, miles away from you

-         - when you hear the voice of your loved ones, while staying far away

-         - when you share happy times with your nephew/niece/grand-daughter or grand-son

-          -when you reunite with your school group or college gang

-          -when you move along the lanes of your old neighborhood, school or college

-          -when you look at your name over a graduation certificate

-          -when you receive recognition for your hard work

-          -when your family enjoys your cooked delicacy

-          -when you get that much awaited email about work

-          -when you look at your first pay check

-          -when your toddler takes his/her first step

-          -when you look at your baby for the first time

-          -when someone hears your mind, even before your words speak out

-          -when you admire rising or setting sun that looks as a natural painting by the universe

-          -when you learn to seek happiness, rather than demand it from those around!

  If word-limit meant nothing, this blog post could go on for long. Several moments like these bring out the happiness of life. Though these experiences may sound routine and usual, they turn out to be the ‘best’ treasures ever. While breathing is just another usual activity, these moments add value to the air and meaning to life!

    Live such ‘alive’ moments and enjoy life, after all it is all about happiness, smiles, laughter and joy!

You are not alone in this

Imagine you enter into a famous restaurant on a busy weekend, yet find it completely empty without any patrons at all!

Though this would mean no hassles of waiting for your table and food, won’t you find it odd to be alone in such kind of a place?

Imagine you are glancing into your study material for the last time at an examination hall and realize that you are the only one appearing for the exam, without any sign of your friends and classmates!

Though this would mean no competition at all, won’t it be sad to go through the stress of exams alone?

Imagine you are going through a difficult phase in office with piling pressure of responsibilities, yet you find yourself completely alone in the workplace!

Won’t it be unusual to realize that you have no colleagues to talk to or share your difficult experiences with?

Imagine if every stage of your life was to be lived alone, without any experiences, guidance, support or opinions from your loved ones?

Won’t it be difficult to go through everything alone?

     As simple and natural as it sounds, we owe a lot to the feeling of being surrounded with people, as they go through the same phase like us. Probably one of the best reasons that bring friends into our lives, spending our moments with them and sharing our experiences make us human in every way. The thought of not being alone adds energy and enthusiasm into our system, as we realize that every individual around us has a life to live. Though our dreams, hopes, interests and goals differ from those around us, the thought of being surrounded with people keeps us going.

   Think about any aspect in your life and you will understand that there was someone with you always. From playful childhood to carefree teenage, from ambitious youth to hardworking adult-life, every phase of life appears interesting, when we look at people going through the same course as us. It will not make your journey any easier or shorter, yet it will inspire you to continue as you are not alone in this. While you are struggling with your final exams or hunting for a good job, while you are stressing over the thought of marriage or planning to start a family, someone somewhere is going through the same challenges, making you confident that life journey is interesting, colorful, adventurous, yet challenging for all.

   We all know that every individual has a unique route to follow with unique share of tolls, roadblocks, stop signs and red signals. Yet, as we all have to reach our final destination with the reserve of fuel, we realize that nothing is simple for anyone. Though some individuals may seem to be resourceful with easy course of life, they still have to address their share of difficulties along the way. 

    As each one of us move through our maze of challenges, we are motivated by the thought that someone else is working on their way too. We may never realize this or think over the aspect, but support and experiences of our friends help us in an unknown way. Even though their experiences may not have direct relationship with anything that is going on in our own life, we tend to remember their words always. Over a course of time, when we find ourselves in similar situation, we are definitely able to draw some inspiration.

     This thought of not being alone can be easily related to the aspect of team spirit. When we work together as a team, we are suddenly pumped with energy, interest, confidence and trust. What we consider as impossible so far, soon transforms into an easy act, as everyone is geared towards the same mission. Being surrounded by like-minded set of friends offer us several happy moments in life, as we experience the wonders together. It gives us the confidence to march ahead, without worrying about the output. Besides, offering us support to pass through usual phases in life, experiences of people throw light over the fact that most of our everyday troubles are similar too.

How else will you explain the joy of women, when they gossip over their husbands? Or what is the motive behind male bonding, as they discuss about the troubles of their wives?

Having support of people who go through same set of challenges as your own seems to the best gift of mankind.

After a thoughtful look over the topic, let us look into some funny situations to draw a little humor:

1.       Men, you are not alone

     - When you accidentally help your wife in washing dishes or ironing her clothes, there are many other loyal husbands who do the same.

 -  When you use the excuse that your wife has something planned for you, in order to bail out from your set of friends, there are many men who use this guaranteed sell-able excuse.

 - When you are innocent as a little kid, yet you are blamed for everything that goes wrong in the house.

2.       Women, you are not alone

-          To hear about one tiny, insignificant task done by your husband over and over again for several years in the future, though you work hard for the house always.

-          To be blamed for gossiping, excessive shopping or taking too much time to get dressed, though your husband may talk with his friends for hours or have a huge collection of wardrobe, hidden safely in the closet.

As we talk to our friends, colleagues, neighbors and relatives, we realize that each one of us is sailing through the same boat. Staying together in a society with support and affection of our loved ones is all we need, as we move along the course of life.

                   Live your life, enjoy the moments, make memories and rejoice – after all you are not alone in this. Stay assured, you have equally high number of folks, just as confused, overwhelmed and clueless as you are! 

One can’t live, with or without ‘you’…

   

     Curious to know, what does this ‘you’ stand for? What object does it represent or which particular person/relation does it talk about? Before I dive into the thought and continue my pondering, let me start by saying - this post is not a scientific one; explaining the need of food, water, oxygen or heartbeat necessary for our survival. It does not represent ‘money’ or ‘assets’, though they do qualify as essential factors for our existence. This post is about the dearest better half, whom we label as our ‘spouse’ or ‘life partner’. It is about the perfect ‘imperfect’ person who chooses to stay with us for a lifetime. After digging into the wonderful relationship of parenthood in my last post, it was time to explore the beauty of yet another bond that means the world to us.

    After 22 months of marital bliss, I was tempted to analyze this relation that seems unusual, yet exciting at the same time. As a carefree single enjoying the freedom of life, I always thought to myself,

‘How can one spend their entire life with another person, just to gain membership into this mandatory institution called ‘marriage’?

‘Whether love or arranged, how does this relation ensure happiness, peace and all the wonders that it claims to offer?

‘Though, everyone often mock about the troubles of a married life, why are more and more people curious to jump into this pool and swim for a lifetime?’

    It is only after you experience it yourself, when the reality of this relation spreads it aura. A wonderful partnership with a person you love, this bond is about the little fights, but big smiles. It is the only relationship where you can disagree on any aspect, yet stand together as a team, while facing the world. An all-in-one package of friendship, romance, competition, disagreement, understanding and maturity, one cannot stay away from the beauty of this bond. Though we may find numerous reasons to joke, gossip, complain and discuss over this interesting part of our lives, we cannot live without such a trusted friend.

    Life-partner is that person who can point your mistakes with honest truth and force you to look at the other side of the coin. This relation does not translate into complete agreement over every aspect, but it certainly stands for enjoying the disagreements. Though your life partner may annoy you with their beliefs, principles, habits and mannerism, there is happiness in their contrast views too. Unknowingly, one falls in love with these differences to celebrate a lifetime, filled with surprises and novelties.

   Back to the title of the post, this interesting relationship is marked by numerous ups and downs. It resembles a roller coaster ride. Right from the moment you promise to live as partners (after a grand celebration of course!) to every step along the way, this journey offers total surprises. From peaceful moments where you completely fall in love with your sweetheart, while counting your blessings to heated moments filled with anger, disagreement, irritation and sorrow; this journey is about ‘expecting the unexpected’. For one moment, we may celebrate their presence, appreciating our life; only to be followed by a moment, where we may think about the difficulties to live together. Though these complaints enter into our lives quite often, the beauty lies in their sudden disappearance.

    I am always tempted to associate this relationship with the word ‘interesting’, because every single aspect about this bond surprises me. Though 22 months are long enough to get a hold of it, this marital bliss continues to teach me along the way. Amidst happy experiences with big, broad smiles to not-so-happy moments, the journey is totally worth it. 

   After spending some crucial years of your life as a single individual, when life offers this opportunity to stay with a partner, it does add purpose to your existence. Marriage is always connected with terms such as ‘sacrifice’, ‘compromise’ and ‘togetherness’, though these terms may seem too superficial to be true, they do bring out the best in the relation. The decision to spend your life with someone else is the key that ensures a smooth ride ahead.

  Unless, I dig into some common myths associated with this wonderful marital bond, I cannot justify my post. Let me share some of the stereotypical myths about this perfectly ‘imperfect’ bond, while you offer your feedback about the same!

1.       Marriage ends your individuality: Totally untrue by all means, this myth can scare singles away. Marriage does not end your individuality, instead it offers you a friend, critic, guide and teacher for your tasks and ambition. It provides you a ‘partner-in-crime’ to be yourself forever.

2.       Marriage means complete agreement: It is impossible to match your beliefs with another individual as an instant side effect to your marital vows. Though you agree to support each other, you may still disagree with their thoughts. Marriage simply means an agreement to disagree, whenever necessary.

3.       Married couples must socialize with same friends: Marriage cannot take you away from your set of friends. You can still continue with your usual course of life, like before. Though marriage does expand your social circle, it does not demand sacrifice of your older ties.

4.       Married couples should enjoy same activities or must have loads to talk about: Marriage cannot change your hobbies, interests and ambitions. Suddenly, you may not enjoy the same activities, just because they are enjoyed by your better half. It can certainly expand your horizon, but it cannot transform you completely.

This puts an end to the wonderful tale of a sweet-sour relation. Do send in your comments, feedback, experiences and beliefs to celebrate the bond of ‘love’.  

P.S: Dear husband, Thank you for being such a sport, while reading the draft. You have truly inspired this post in every way, because I am sure, neither one of us can live, with or without ‘us’! 

The perfect pair called ‘Parents’

 

    Growing up, I always believed that parents were the luckiest set of people on this earth. Without any rules, restrictions, limitations and permissions that were allowed to perform any task at any time. After all, who would have the permission to put on the television set in the house or decide the menu for the day? From clothes to food, holidays to house arrangements, as parents were the primary headmasters in every task, I always admired this ‘right’ to do it all.

   Little did I know these activities were not lucky perks, but unavoidable responsibilities. What I fancied as the universal passport for any aspect was nothing but mandatory file to run the family. With almost half number of my friends and my dear sister in this club of ‘parenthood’, I was prompted to write about the perfect pair that never seem to go wrong.

    I am still looking around for the magic potion that converts carefree individuals into responsible parents. After all, how did my silly acting school friend turn into a matured father or mother or what entered into my sister’s mind as she cares for her little superstar with all her love? Though I may not succeed in hunting for this magic potion, I am sure it grows within an individual, when one decides to take up this unusual, yet interesting responsibility. From sleepless nights to busy days, from loving angels to strict teachers as parents run around with their duties, they are definitely powered by some superhuman force. After nine months of preparation, when they finally enter the stage for their role as ‘parents’, they simply refuse to leave the show anytime in the future.

   No matter how old you may turn to be or how far you may go, you will always find these set of people, appreciating you for some aspect. Their hands are eager to clap and faces geared with smiles, as they see their little ones flourish in life. Suddenly, they forget themselves in an attempt to experience this journey of ‘parenthood’. Everything revolves around the little one that holds their attention every minute of the day. From food to fun, sleep to smile, play to pleasure, every single aspect involves the new boss in life. Though I have no experience in this department of parenthood, I am sure there is some element in the air that they breathe, making them perfect in every way.

      Parenting transforms these individuals with the natural ability to protect and provide. Besides, sacrifice and compromise form a different ball game all together that deserves another blog post. Holding the interest of their little ones ahead of their own tasks, they toil to bring out the best in them. 

   They are equipped with the capability to bring happiness and peace in the lives of their kids. Though children occupy the center stage of their story, they have the amazing ability to play contrasting roles.One moment they may play ‘best friend’ running around with their little ones and second moment they may play a ‘Principal’ bringing discipline in their conduct. Though parents are forced to act tough to discipline their kids for acceptable behavior in the society, they seem to know the tricks of the trade. While they may shout with little anger, their words are laced with nothing but love and concern. Only parents can display disappointment, yet pull their children towards them with loving charm.

   Though the entire world may fail to trust your goals, your parents seem to know your colorful future. Only parents can believe in you, when you may talk about your plans to be a ‘singer’, though your stage may be limited to a bathroom alone or discuss about your dreams to buy a ‘Mercedes’, though your bank balance may be nowhere close to it! I wonder what do parents eat - as their thoughts, actions, beliefs and ideas are always centered around the success of their kids.

 Now, though parents are undoubtedly ‘perfect’, they are humans too. I was tempted to clear some of the myths and remind us all that they deserve normal course of life.

1.       Parents are allowed to be imperfect

Yes, Moms and Dads, relax! You can oversleep on a weekend or eat loads of your favorite ice-cream, once in a while.

2.       Parents can forget their kids for a while

This controversial statement does not endorse complete removal from the memory. It only means that parents can also engage in fun activities or outing with their friends, but without their kids for some alone time.

3.       Parents need a clap and a pat too

Though they are always busy with claps and pats for their kids, they deserve appreciation in every way. They must be congratulated for the wonderful task of raising trees for tomorrow.

4.       Parents can go wrong too

Parents are allowed to mix-up with some daily tasks or fail in their ambitious plans. As they are humans after all, they can perform their share of mistakes too.

      Every parent on this earth deserves the certificate of ‘Best parents’, after all they are the perfect pair.

P.S: To my Mom Dad, I am sure that I cannot match your perfectness in any way. For the best parents in this world, I hope to reach at least 20% of your style.

To my Sister, as usual I have a complaint about you. You seem to have taken away all ‘the good parenting skill’ genes from Mom Dad once again, leaving nothing for me. But, I am happy with the output of an adorable nephew who deserves nothing but the best!  

Let me give you an advice

   

  Surprised by this unusual title?

  Wondering if you ever asked me for an advice, before I blog over it?

   But, isn’t that the real aim behind giving advice?

     Though we may never really ask for an advice, this unwanted piece of internal mind chooses to flaunt its presence all around. In a world where everything comes to us at a cost, advice is something that is freely available. Advice is our share of knowledge that we deliver for the benefit of others. This piece of knowledge can be truly categorized as valuable, if one seeks it from us. Offering advice when asked for it is the true meaning of giving one. Providing 2 cents of our limited knowledge over a topic that is not really ours is the root cause of trouble. Though I am not against giving advice or sharing opinion with others, the underlying reason of this blog is to look at the good and not so good world of advice.

   Many a times, advice is the only way to connect with others socially. With an aim to blend into a group or initiate a topic for conversation, we may end up advising those around us. Advice can turn into an undesirable experience, if we insist on holding a strong opinion. As long as we offer an advice pertaining to our domain or based on our own set of adventures, they can prove beneficial to the receiving ears. While advice fueled with an aim to dominate, impress or rule can lead to nothing but irritating expressions and ignored outlook. Advice born out of total inexperience are the worst elements of disturbance as they can interfere with someone’s head, yet lead to no beneficial output.

    We often come across so-called ‘learned’ people in the society that seem to have a solution for everything. Be it conflicts between two nations on the other end of the globe or be it trouble involving a celebrity, be it global environmental issues or concerns about moral values, these learned resources seem to hold an opinion, along with a strong desire to offer their advice towards anyone lending their ears. Advising someone about their individual choices or personal beliefs, based on conventional society norms are some of the mistakes of the modern world that need rectification.

    Advice can turn into unwanted words, when the real aim is to prove one’s superiority. As we move along the uncertain route of our life, we definitely need pieces of advice for the further course. During times like this - seeking advice, listening to someone’s opinions and collecting their experiences can prove to be beneficial. Though we may collect several advice on the way, we must be able to analyze it well for our own situation. As each one of us has a different canvas to work on, we cannot follow every word of the advice. Just as delivering valuable advice when asked for is a huge responsibility in itself, receiving the advice and processing it towards our good is also equally important. Being upset about an unwanted advice can only lead us towards more trouble, wasting our valuable time over nothing.

     While this was the serious outlook towards advice, I was tempted to draw some humor from the same. Let us dive into the hidden thoughts of an interested and uninterested pair of ears, while listening to stereotypical advice about typical significant matters in life.

1.       Advice on stream of education:

Advice: “Science is the only option for you, after all you have scored excellent in your qualifying exam. Commerce was the second best option if you scored less marks, and arts is not appropriate for your score.”

Interested ears: This seems perfect. Totally makes sense. With such good marks, I should choose Science, I will not be able to justify my selection of Arts to others. And commerce was good if I scored little less.

Uninterested ears: This advice is yet another stereotypical piece of our society. Good entertaining outlook, but it is necessary to dig into my interests and aptitude, before the final decision.

2.       Advice on career

Advice: “Freelancing is not good at all. Business is risky and not for you, as you do not have father’s business to continue. 9 to 5 job is best for you.”

Interested ears: Yes correct.  Sticking to the traditional 9 to 5 is a perfect advice for me. No risk, worries and tensions.

Uninterested ears: I cannot make decisions based on these set rules. Though the advice reflects stability and confirmed income, it does not match with my passion.

3.       Advice on marriage

Advice: “You must marry at the right age. It is important to fulfill this major responsibility on time, other things can wait, but marriage cannot.”

Interested ears: This advice has opened my eyes about connection between marriage and age. It should be taken into consideration immediately.

Uninterested ears: My plans of travel, career and hobbies may not fit into this acceptable time frame. Instead, marriage can wait.

4.       Advice on starting a family

Advice: “You must start a family now after a year of marriage. Kids grow up fast, you will not even realize. It is important to stay young, while they grow.

Interested ears: This makes sense. Children and family expansion should go as per calculation of married years.

Uninterested ears: Kids cannot grow on their own, unless we are prepared to bring a new life and take this huge responsibility.

5.       Advice on parenthood

Advice: “You must not allow kids to take their own decision. They are too small for this responsibility. You must do all the talking for them.”

Interested ears: This will work best for our children. It is important to decide for them.

  Uninterested ears: This sounds as an age-old custom of the historic times. 

  In today’s world, it is important to listen to kids and understand their stand too.

These are just some pieces of imagination, designed to draw happiness from the entertaining world of advice. Do send in your feedback over this aspect that relates to all. Whether you love advice or hate them, your comment is definitely valuable for the blogger in me!