V: Vacate without vacation

 I can actually picture you asking “Does that even make sense?” How is one supposed to vacate without actually going on a vacation? Isn’t the primary purpose of vacation to vacate our minds, schedule, responsibilities and explore around to do something fun? Going on a vacation is actually a birthright where you can stay off from work and usual routine to rejuvenate, relax and come back inspired. Irrespective of age, gender, occupation, income and lifestyle, everyone deserves a vacation once in a while. 

    Whether you stretch it over number of days to soak every possible luxury or crunch in between your busy schedule, whether you align it with your kids’ vacation (which is what happens usually) or take off solo to an exotic destination, each one of us should (bold for emphasis) invest in some form of vacation. Now though we all know the significance of vacation, there are somethings called as ‘budget’ and ‘time’ that may not permit it so often. While juggling between holidays, work, finances and mounting priorities, this exciting experience often takes a backseat. Though we strive to take that big annual vacation, it may not materialize, depending on the task at hand.

  Talking about significance of vacation is not the primary aim of this post. Before I wander into the beauty of vacations and find myself in some exotic place (read: Hawaii or Florida or Spain or Maldives or France- my fingers are doing all of this typing, involuntarily!), let me get back to the title in question. Since I know my blogger mind well, I am sure it will take me to some destination right while sitting at this desk (much to the delight and happiness of my husband), but that is not the intention of this post. 

  When it was time to craft about the next letter in series ‘V’, I was unknowingly attracted towards the word ‘vacation’. I am not sure whom should I hold responsible? Whether it is my freelance writer profile that types off travel articles now and then or my blogger mind who can just wander away into the world of thoughts, there is something quite appealing about ‘vacation’. The thought of vacation pulls me into a magical world of experiences, reflecting over my choice of words. And hence before I know it, I am using it as the next word in my series.

   But (there are always buts and ifs), taking a vacation is not something that happens easily. In fact planning, executing, packing and traveling form a long series of events that often scare people off. And returning after a relaxing vacation is another bitter experience. Looking at those photographs, while trying to focus back on work is nothing less than a herculean task. This is when you realize the appropriateness of the statement “I will need another vacation to get over the fun of this vacation”. Do not make an attempt to read between the lines and convince your family not to go for one. In no way, am I endorsing the harm of vacation. But, when the feasibility and possibility of taking multiple vacations is impossible to say the least, the mind does something termed as ‘hack’.

 It does not replace long relaxing holidays completely, yet offers some moments of vacation within a day. In today’s world where we can find some twisted solution for everything, I was inspired why not do the same for vacation? This is how the idea ‘vacate without vacation’ comes into picture.

  It is not a foolproof idea or a practical innovation. Do not blame me if it does not work for you. But, do thank me if it saves your money! We often focus over the physical benefits of vacation. Because we travel someplace else, it energizes our body and mind. So, if we could extract a part of this essence into our everyday life, can we enjoy vacated moments in a day? If the aim of a vacation is to vacate our minds, taking off the usual pressures and doing something off the charts, can we do it along the daily routine too? And beyond moving from point A to point B at far off places, can vacation mean vacating right here and now? I agree it does not replace traveling, but is it still worth a try? This approach will definitely work for the mind portion, but not the body. When we stir away from expected chores for a short while and seek relaxation within a day, it is entirely possible to do so. I am sure most of us will tend to blame ‘busy’ routine and ‘tight’ schedule before going ahead. 24 hours in a day are insufficient for our normal chores, let alone introduce some off-the-way vacated moments? But, we can always strive to see if it works. It has worked for me, hence I will persuade you to see if this experiment succeeds.

   Going forward, ideas do not work unless backed with practical actions. Unless I share my tools of vacating without vacations, I cannot expect feedback from your end. These are just usual actions that we all perform along a day. What matters is the perspective. After reading, you may realize it is nothing different- in fact well within your schedule. You are already doing it, but not through the same lens. If you look at it as ‘vacating’, it may mean something inspirational. Often when we look at things the other way, it does turn beneficial.

   Treat them as examples and inputs from my end. I will wait for your ideas, and actions to add to the pool. Together we can look at life a little differently.

1.       Looking at nature- I cannot think of any form of relaxation so pure, rich, effective and natural than looking at nature. As I admire the sight of mountains, sunset, clouds, trees or just the plain blue sky, it transports me someplace else. So much is the power of their presence, they manage to vacate my mind and fill it with inspiration. It forces me to go ‘carpe diem’, everything we want is here and now. Devoting few moments in the day, just to admire natural beauty turns it into a vacation of a sort, too good to put into words.

2.       Reading a book – Though this activity is more of a job requirement for my profile, it never feels so. Reading a book turns into a meditative action, as I enjoy the flow of words. No other action can demand your senses to be right there and concentrate to the fullest. It takes away all the usual thoughts from the mind, while all you are expected to do is focus on the line in sight.

3.       Watching few minutes of comedy- This manner of vacating mind is encouraged only for a short while. Otherwise you will blame me for excessive television time. I never understood the joy of watching serious thrillers over screen. When in life we are already surrounded by enough dark clouds, why don’t we relax in something as funny as good, healthy humor? I am not in any position to criticize suspense, thriller or reality-based genres. It takes lot of efforts to create one. But in order to align with my sense of vacating mind, few minutes of comedy is the best solution to do so. English series F.R.I.E.N.D.S and Hindi program ‘Taarak Mehta ka Ooltah Chasmah’ are my go-to solutions to just forget and laugh off.

4.       Savoring that first sip of coffee- Save the criticism, medical articles and theories about harm/benefit of coffee for later use, because one cup per day does more good than harm. I am sorry but my love for coffee automatically puts me into a defensive mode. It may be coffee, tea or chocolate milk for you, but the underlying factor is calmness, peace, energy and confidence that follows. I truly get all of this from just one cup because that silence for a short while is enough vacation for an entire day.

  If we seek such moments of vacation in our daily schedule, it will surely offer some benefits. I agree it cannot replace the joy of visiting places or ticking off items from your travel list. As a strong advocate of traveling, I myself will jump at the first opportunity to get going. But, finding happiness to make each day special is what defines our outlook towards life. If we are able to fill such ‘blissful’ moments in the canvas of our day, the entire picture will look much more appealing, while we count days for the next trip.

 Ready to vacate without vacation? Do share your feedback, criticism, agreement or disagreement. It is always fun to continue the discussion ‘off-the-record’!

U: Universal laws of ‘being human’

   This is what happens when you read too much of physics, astronomy and non-fiction. Thanks to my new found love for non-fiction since past couple of days (and an accessible library to do so), my blogger mind is pulled towards laws, rules, facts and theories. Though that does not make me any sounder in science, it has definitely helped my creative arts. And since creative arts is about creating, what better way to express my affection than to combine these two streams into a post. Hence, the birth of my next post on letter ‘U’. As I move closer to the end of this A-Z series, I realize how influential these alphabets are? Besides the sing-song of A to Z that craves a permanent spot in our memory since childhood, every alphabet is so resourceful in the world of vocabulary.

  Now, while it is impossible to craft serious concepts over blog posts, I thought why not do just the opposite? Why not introduce humor, sarcasm, fun and uniqueness into something as important as physics laws and concepts to laugh at the lighter side of life? And why not draw fun at our human nature that makes us a unique social animal on this planet?

    At the onset, let me set forth a disclaimer - I do not intend to make fun of any of our great scientists, researchers, laws or theories that form a significant part of our life. I do not intend to mock their great efforts and contribution to the society. Without physics and their incredible input, we would not reach where we are today. Hence, kindly take it with a pinch of salt. This post uses some concepts of physics as a framework to laugh at our essence of humanity. The underlying thought is to tickle our funny bones and get back to work.

 The word ‘universal’ is extremely significant here because these apply to every individual on the planet. As living forms with mind and heart, we feel and experience many unique aspects that make us interesting. These stand for our obvious nature and behavior. Though each one of us are different with a novel outlook towards life, there are some things that unite us under the umbrella of being human. The aim is to capture those funny aspects and enjoy the essence of mankind. And though we take pride over the fact that we are different from others, we are still united by some weaknesses and strengths of being an equipped resource of this earth.

  Stay with me as I unfold five universal laws of being human as seen, observed, regarded and assumed by my mind. It may resonate with you or run parallel to your thought process. In either case, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy penning (read-typing) it.

  Moving forward, kindly remove your critic glasses and put on your humor lenses.  And after you are done reading, do share your feedback with whichever lenses you wish to put on!

1.       Reality is inversely proportional to expectation

 For this concept, there is no better example than looking at a mannequin. You enter into a clothes store and admire a perfect outfit on it. Or for today’s online world, you see a model on the shopping website. You love it because it looks incredible, beautiful, amazing and just wow to say the least. It is then followed by numerous images of beauty floating over your own mind, making you happy in your dreams. You are convinced you will look just like the model, carrying the outfit as wonderfully as him/her. But, life is not so wonderful, is it? Soon the reality steps in when you try it yourself and meet that laughing head called ‘reality’. 

Often in life, our expectations and realities are like opposite poles that cannot be united no matter what. What we expect may turn out to be totally different, yet wonderful in its own way. The fun of life is getting what we expect the least because that adds surprise, thrill, suspense and fun into an otherwise boring serial of never ending episodes. Though reality and expectation may be inversely proportional, it shouldn’t stop us from making efforts. Because hard work takes us closer to our goal, one step at a time.

 “Ask not what you want, but what is good for you”, these philosophical words re-quoted by my philosophical husband seem to fit in perfectly.

2.       Chaos is the only constant

This concept needs no explanation. You plan a big event with every single detail chalked to attention. You spend years, months, days, hours or minutes (depending on the project) to ensure everything goes as per plan. But, is that life laughing at you from the wing? Of course it is, because it is sending its favorite subordinate ‘chaos’ your way. Call it chaos, confusion, misunderstanding, unexpected circumstance or whatever fancy word you wish to pick from the dictionary, things do not go as per plan.

Somethings will go south, tossing your ideas to a certain extent. But, the real fun lies in this chaos. If our life was moving smoothly over a track at a fixed speed, would it be fun? Though I am nodding my head because it does sound good, it is not true. Some minor set-backs, confusion, last moment changes and unexpected twists are essential to keep us going.

What we fail to understand should come into the picture to increase our curiosity, attention, interest and enthusiasm. Such constant chaos will keep us on our feet, forcing us to do something rather than sitting calmly. Sometimes it is good to just relax, but too much of it can be dangerous too. Enjoy the chaos because these last minute thrills end up penning down the best stories of your life. We do not remember the formal ceremony of a wedding, but we do remember the 'punctuality-hating' caterer who amplified our hunger or the non-cooperative designer who kept the groom in his pajamas for too long.

3.      Realization is independent of time

     “Do not believe now, you will realize it later” or “When I was your age…” these words of your parents will always ring in your mind because they know it all ahead of time. As kids we do not realize why our elders keep repeating some irrelevant quotes of knowledge but everything makes sense when we go through those things ourselves. I should apologize my mom for sending unlimited hiccups her way because the number of times I remember her confident words since my childhood only keep increasing. The universal truth is we do not realize immediately at that instant. Label it ignorance, ego, free-will or immaturity, we cannot accept things when told to us now and here

      

      It takes a short while before we are able to realize it, hence I believe in its independent equation with respect to time. There is nothing wrong in not understanding some things right away. We are allowed some buffer time to load our life slowly. But, we should make sure it happens at the appropriate time. You may not understand why parents talk about settling down in life or striving to build assets every now and then. It will make sense someday along the journey, when you will hear "I had told you so."

4. Every thought has an equal and opposite doubt

       This concept is a bit subjective in nature. Whether you are a doubtful anxious person who worries about every single thing in life or whether you are confident to accept whatever comes your way decides its relevance. Thanks to a workaholic mind who cannot quit overthinking, we often find ourselves surrounded by cloud of worries. Every thought that germinates in our mind is followed by an equally powerful but diametrically opposite doubt. Like waves that rise and fall, thoughts rise in our mind with excitement and enthusiasm followed by falling doubts with disappointment.

 It is human to doubt and weigh consequences but inhuman to keep thinking. Thoughts are useless unless accompanied by actions. All your ‘buts’ and ‘ifs’ must cease at some point to make way for ‘congrats’ and ‘best wishes’.

You doubt if that evening walk will really help your fitness goals, but what is the harm in enjoying the action of spending time with nature?

5.       Mind is always at rest unless triggered by social media

  I can actually picture my husband screaming “Hear, Hear!” and nodding in full agreement to this statement. If there is one thing in life he will ever agree with me (How can it be more than one? Isn’t disagreement the middle name of marriage?), it has to be this one. He cannot disagree because I am guilty of this concept. He has seen an example of how his wife’s mind (and hence his) is peacefully at rest until she scrolls up and down over her phone on social media. And then what follows is chaos.

    

Thanks to social media - unlimited travel pictures and colorful photographs of people at parties create unrest in your otherwise peaceful mind. Till your phone is sitting quietly, everything is beautiful. But when it rings and glows and shows, you are forced to wonder why my life is not as colorful as that happy face on social media?

 Take this thought with a pinch of salt because there is fun in staying connected. There is no harm in sharing your happy moments with others. As long as you are able to find joy in social media, there is nothing wrong about it. Enjoy it to be a part of happiness, keeping jealously or comparisons at bay.

 As for me, dear husband, I cannot stop getting triggered. How can I not force you to book that next trip without showing dozens of photographs, every day? It’s okay to not practice what you preach, well, once in a while.

 

   This brings me to the end of my twisted concepts. Do send your valuable feedback. It will help me strengthen my application to recognize these universal laws, before I propose them to the committee of ‘being human’!

T: Time has the final say - serious musings, once in a while!

Waking up to a missed hour

   The timing could not be more perfect to write about time. As body and mind are still adjusting to the clock forward concept of daylight saving from yesterday, it only seems apt to ponder a little. And though it was shift of just an hour, the fact that it manipulated digits on the clock is enough to create a difference.

   Time is probably the greatest heroes of all times because of the kind of attention it receives.

   Right from school as we learn dozens of proverbs and sayings to add value to life, the concept of time pops in again and again. ‘Time and tide wait for no man’, ‘Time is money’, ‘A stitch in time saves nine’ only remind about the essence of time. And why just proverbs, the significance of time is repeated over and over again by the ticking clock who seems to scream ‘Look, I am slipping away’.

Governing situations, creating circumstances

   Time always manages to have the final say because of its indispensable nature. We all need it as a leading factor of life. It basically puts everything into perspective. No matter how many efforts we invest or how many plans we harbor, time will always walk away with the last word. Unless circumstances are ideal or situations are adequate, it is impossible to work against it.

  The value of time lies in the fact that everything happens at the right moment. If the timing is not correct, things do not go as per plan. It does not mean we deter away from our efforts or give everything up under the pretext that nothing is in our hands, it only means that time is absolutely crucial or the ‘make and break’ factor. Time will always have the final say as it is the frame of our existence. It defines our past, present, future. It reminds us that past is passed time with nothing within our control, future is the time yet to come, hence obviously not within reach. All we have is the present time to create a difference or burn it away in vain.

As unique as the position of hands on clock

  For something as unique as time, there is no doubt in its significance. After all, it only comes once. Time is able to retain value due to its non-repetitive ability. It does not repeat itself to give you the lost opportunity just one more time. Often, we regret our failure due to lack of adequate preparation, yet our plea for another chance cannot replicate the same situation under the same circumstance at the same hour!

  Another way to look at the value of time is its ability to turn the events. We may think about a particular situation in our heads, cooking stories even before it actually happens. All our anticipation, expectation, worries, anxieties and thoughts are nothing but fragments of imagination and totally fictitious. It is only when time arrives at the situation, when the events materialize into reality. I am tempted to picture time as a royal king who walks towards his throne, only after everyone awaits his arrival at their respective positions. It is the ultimate aspect that can make things happen.

  The ultimate-decision maker

   Factors such as luck, belief, desire, hope, hard work, preparation and planning are just participants in the wing. Time is the conductor that ensures each of these players strike the chord. Whether they succeed in their performance or fail in their attempt is something only time can tell. Time is the decision maker when it comes to the final show.

  They say it is essential to value time because it determines our attitude towards life. Whether we place ourselves over time in a stunt to control our life or whether we respect it for giving us an opportunity forms our approach.

  When we find ourselves surrounded by numerous uncertainties and questions, we end up saying ‘Let the time come’. Because no matter how difficult it may seem to admit, time does have a control over our journey. It has a final say for throwing the right cards at the right time. 

  You may have mountain of dreams in your head but none of it makes sense unless you invest efforts when the time is apt to do so. Or else each one of us could have aced our school examination in college! With the desire to control your own path, you cannot be independent of time. You will still need its presence to pull your plan the way you intend to do. And after investing every inch of effort, it is imperative to wait for the clock to strike.

If only all our software updates and technologies could give us an edge over time!

   Even though we have made advances in every domain of life, the act of ‘time-travel’ is still an impossible fictitious tale in the making. We cannot go back in time to change the events or neither can we know how our future will be to plan ahead of time. No high-tech advancement can show us how or what lies ahead in the time to come. Time reserves all the mystery, suspense, uncertainty and thrill of things. No amount of money, skills, efforts, luck or influence can take you ahead from where we all are right now.

Fair chance, fair play, fair game 

  Every living form on this planet has to live under the mercy of time. I like to look at it as a fair opportunity provider that equalizes everyone under its umbrella. You and I are seen through the same set of eyes called time. You may be rich, poor, intelligent, artistic, ambitious, good, bad, saint, wicked, evil, talented, skilled, lazy, hard-working, city-dweller, villager, young, old, serious, worried, happy or boring, but none of this matters to time. It will not bring more hours to the wealthy owing to his/her assets, neither will it take away minutes from a child. Everyone is given same number of seconds, minutes, and hours along the course of a day. Do whatever you want, but there are no extra minutes for the well behaved or no bonus hours for the good kids.

   All of this points to the influence of time. It certainly has lot of certainties stored under its belt - knowing everything, but revealing nothing.

 Shake hands with time, make it a tool, respect its presence and be friends with it. You can hide, run, rage, ignore, pretend - but you cannot escape from the ‘know-it-all’ hero called ‘TIME.’

S: Sugar, salt, spice – flavorful lessons in disguise

   

   At this point, I think I am spending way too much time eating, savoring or drooling over food or else how can I justify the choice of picking these words? When it was time to write about the next letter in series S, I was surprised by these words, nagging their way into my thoughts. And before I know it, I am typing them happily with a smile over my stomach! 

  While the letter S seemed easy with so many words to pick from, my mind went straight into the kitchen. Though my blogging fingers could type about some serious aspects such as ‘S for Sacrifice’ or ‘S for Satisfaction’, I wonder about its decision to go for these basic ingredients of food. But, nothing can be done about it now and so here I am pondering about the ABC of every cuisine.

   Sugar, salt and spice need no introduction - They are the first things that greet you in your kitchen as you look forward to cooking or savoring a meal. No matter what part you play in the process of food preparation, you know about the necessity of these basic heroes. And at the same time, no matter what equation you share with your food, you will still need these three in your system. 

  

   Whether you are a die-hard foodie with a strong inseparable bond or a non-foodie with pure professional ties for survival; you will know about the significance of sugar, salt, spice. It does not take a chef to create magic with these three, all it takes are our ‘know-it-all’ taste buds who can sense their presence or absence right away.

  Sugar, salt, spice are rightly termed as ‘basic’ because of their ability to change the outcome of food. Just think about any kind of dish in any cuisine across the globe, these three find their way into it. Sure, the proportions may vary or the combination of spices may change, but at the end, they are required in some amounts. Also, I agree it is essential to reduce the quantity of sugar and salt for health reasons or lower down spices for a trouble-free appetite, but it still manages to create difference in the overall taste.

  More than the quantity, it is their indispensable nature that forced me to think about it. I do not intend to write a scientific article explaining the need to cut them down for good health or a culinary article talking about how to use them for good taste. My idea is to learn something from these three. Their indispensable nature coupled with the ability to lose themselves completely into the meal yet retain their value has prompted me to think.

 What lessons can I learn from them in my own flavorful dish called life?

 What do these three ingredients teach us, when they make their presence felt in every morsel we eat?

And even if the quantity is reduced, how do they manage to create an impact that speaks (in this case, an impact that tastes)

  I will need your ‘out-of-the-box’ thinking capacity as this article is off-beat in true sense. And if you disagree with any thought along the way, kindly take it with a pinch of salt.

 Here are some of the lessons disguised behind these ingredients as I see them. Feel free to agree/disagree/appreciate or argue in the feedback (you can even express your affection with a treat involving sugar/salt/spice- used separately though!)

1.       Add individualistic value that matters – Be it sugar that sweetens the dessert or salt/spice adding its savory feel, each of these ingredients add their own specific essence to the food. Much like our own life and its journey, it is essential to form our own identity. Engage in passion that adds to your happiness. Live with a purpose to do something good. Contribute your share in collective projects with a unique touch that distinguishes. Add meaning, love, affection, dedication to everything you do. And lastly, do productive things that help those around us.

2.       Appearances are insignificant – Each of these three factors blend into the meal, without the need to be visible. The ability to add essence without screaming their presence loud and clear points to the insignificance of appearance. We can always do good things without the need to show it all. Also, we can be happy without explaining/justifying or proving it to others. As long as you are convinced of your happiness, there is no need to display it always. In today’s world of social media, we end up comparing what shines to what smiles. But, it is equally possible to lay low and soak the fun. It is one thing to share your happiness with those around, and another to make your presence felt by loud appearances.

3.       Dive right into the project – Sugar, salt and spice should be dissolved or mixed well into the meal for their flavors. If we look at it in a metaphorical context, it can mean blending ourselves into life. Unless we mix well in our work with dedication, commitment, determination and desire to make a difference, it may be unproductive to say the least. It is essential to dissolve ourselves into hard work and efforts. Opportunities, situations and circumstances can come and go, but nothing can justify the lack of our participation and involvement. Diving straight into the situation is essential to extract the happiness and satisfaction that follows.

4.       Make yourself unique and indispensable- Sure, there are healthy substitutes to the sweetness of sugar, but salt and spices are indispensable. And even if there are sugar replacements such as honey or jaggery, there is something unique about sugar that makes its absence felt. This prompts me to extrapolate the same into life and see if it works. Find some unique quality and build it further. Make your presence indispensable by contributing something valuable at work. Strive to develop your passion/hobby or work-profile, giving yourself an edge over others. Do what you like and see yourself grow. Creating a niche is essential in our lives. Let people remember you for your uniqueness.

5.       Excess of anything is bad – Your sweet-tooth cannot handle excess sugar in any sweets. Neither can your love for spicy food handle more than acceptable proportion of spices. Anything in excess is unacceptable, undesirable and simply incorrect. Finding a balance is always essential. And this logic applies to every aspect of life. Work, play, entertainment, travel, leisure or relaxation-everything in moderation is the right key.

     Though it is unusual to learn from something as basic as sugar, salt or spice- opening our mindset and seeking values from everything we come across is the way to grow. A month old baby can also teach us as much as any non-living object around. 

  The point is not to judge the teacher or source but to take in the values that follow. 

   As for me, my mind is finally happy for using its choice of words, but stomach is demanding something that involves these three (again to clarify - used separately though!)