16 things I would rather do than go shopping

Disclaimer: For the millions and billions who love shopping, this post may seem disturbing. Read at your own risk. The writer does not wish to offend shopaholics and shop-lovers. Her hatred for what they love is purely based on personal opinion.

  To begin with, the birth-story of this unusual post is quite interesting. As a matter of fact the background idea that led to this article deserves more screen space than the real listicle itself. Because what I will like to do than shop will just be a long list of random actions, but why did I come to this topic at the first place is more exciting. Why the urge to oppose shopping and why the urge to find some funny alternatives? For those who know me well, shopping is the least of my favorite activities. While this may sound too unusual -considering the joy offered by shopping, I am totally unsure why this weird expression in my genome?

   For me shopping was and will always be nothing less than a mandatory activity to ‘buy things’. I must pat my back for openly confessing the novel aspect of my personality. It is not easy to be truthful about such unusual thoughts because we are wired to love shopping. It is a stress buster activity for millions of people around the globe who find pleasure in the variety and quality. And there is nothing wrong if you belong to this expanding group because those are the expected and ‘so-called’ qualities of a ‘normal’ human. And though I have dared to be open about this, I only hope to be loved and accepted like the same way before. Please do not disown me, while I hate your favorite activity.

This attitude places me in a tiny club of minorities who detest shopping. I am not even sure if such a group exists because I am yet to find someone remotely close to my thoughts. And because I do not want to enter into gender-based stereotypical domain, I cannot comment on those who hate or love shopping.

  I am not sure whether I must blame the new-age concept of ‘minimalist living’ or express hatred towards ‘materialistic approach’ for this rather unique behavior. But I am convinced that my hostility towards shopping runs way before any such fancy things entered into the market. That does not mean I do not need to shop, but I am unable to find excitement, happiness or eagerness to do it. Be it shopping for clothes, bags, shoes, home goods or basic food, it turns into a rather heavy responsibility.

  The thought of hunting for items, trying them on and filling bags overwhelms the little dreamer in me who cannot find joy in any of those racks. And though this cost saving aspect of wife should please ‘the man’, he finds it rather scary. Talk about stereotypical nature and expected behavior because it is only natural to be alarmed. You know you hate shopping when you look at it as a punishment. Rather than roaming around in open air, the thought of spending hours in enclosed environment is nothing but punishment after all.

During one such detested experience, while dear husband was busy modelling shoes in his favorite shop for the ‘nth’ time in row, an interesting idea poked into my mind. And before I realized, I was scribbling notes on my phone. Though these scribblings were just broken thoughts at random, they were answers to the question “What I would rather do than shop?” To my surprise, the list grew longer and longer, while my fingers typed them out effortlessly. Those random ideas were just funny actions to engage my mind. But I truly enjoyed the imaginative pleasure that followed.

 Before I enlist them, it is essential to clear my stand. I do not have anything against those who love shopping or find pleasure in all its styles, including window and online. It is an important economic model that is essential at every levels. Also, I have nothing against the brands, shops, retailers, wholesalers and goods. Everything I have is against the better half who drags me into shops! But, I should be thankful to him for planting this interesting blog idea. Though I don’t enjoy shopping, I can continue increasing the length of this list. Every time I drag my feet through a mall or shop, I feel like an ‘Alice in wonderland’. I fail to understand why but walking in shops resembles a guilty feeling of breaking into someone’s backyard. A place I am not supposed to be, yet loiter around for no good reason.

  Coming back on track, while I continue to battle with these ill feelings for the act of shopping, let me share my scribbled list. It is just a funny one intended to amuse my irritated mind.

1.       Count the number of waves on a beach in an hour

2.       Note the changing shades of sky and sea waters from dawn to dusk, while sitting on the beach shore

3.       Hike mountains while counting the number of steps taken

4.       Capture selfie with trees, mountains, sea, sunset, sunrise

5.       Prepare a folder with photographs of diverse cloud patterns and find the appropriate scientific name for each

6.       Spend hours browsing a single shelf of books in library

7.       Sample one book from every non-fictional book shelf

8.       Track the route of flights I see in the sky through a live app

9.       Track the route of a bird till I lose her

10.   Walk around in the neighborhood and count number of trees

11.   Walk bare-feet inside a park lawn

12.   Stare into the sky, appearing to be deep in thoughts, while only thinking about what to eat

13.   Watch mindless comedy shows on phone while sitting on a park bench

14.   Read an entire boring car manual start to end on a beach

15.   Watch TV in the community gym room, while pretending to work out on the treadmill

16.   Read a horror book by the poolside

All of this just proves, I can do anything but shop. Count trees, read manuals, walk or just stare, I can do any of it than wander in malls with ‘n’ number of things that haunt me.

 What is your take on this unusual idea? Do you agree with me (which I highly doubt) or do you believe you can brainstorm my weird thoughts? Whatever be your stand, let the arguments begin…..